Mothering Sunday: Remembrance Day

5 Mar

With Mothers Day approaching on Sunday, I decided to visit my parents resting place this morning instead. From my local florist, I purchased several bunches of daffodils and remarked to the gentleman behind the counter how I admired his window display. I then waited longer than necessary for the usual Number 11 bus and was aware that time was ticking by. I was becoming impatient and irritated by the traffic congestion and all the buses which sped past except the one I needed. It was delayed and once it did arrive, the driver did not offer any explanation or apology. On boarding, I finally managed to find a seat upstairs. Having to alight and wait for another bus just added to my anxieties and dread.

At the approach of the cemetery, the sun was casting a warm light on me, I looked out of the window of my eyes and watched the world pass by. As I walked into the cemetery and walked up towards the plot of land in which my parents are buried, side by side, I looked at the surrounding headstones, marble gravestones and the amount of graves that covered the lush green area of peace and tranquillity. I walked and words wafted through my mind. I placed on the grave without a head stone, two cards which I thought were suitable for the occasion. One, a regular Mother’s Day card and the other, a printed “In Memoriam” verse written on a plastic card. I placed the daffodils in the urns which were now embedded in the earth. I stood still and the words grew stronger, repeating and repeating again. I shed a tear and the words would not leave me alone. I sat down on a wooden bench and started to write the words which haunted my thoughts. Bereft of pen and paper, as well as my very supportive parents, I entered words on my mobile as a text message in case I forgot and sent them to myself.  Here are those words:

So many lives loved

So many souls lost

And my heart leapt in expectation

my breath stopped in anticipation

and the daffodils wept for liberation

as the numbers marked on your grave lost momentum.

My mind went blank in desperation

Think I’m losing my faith or is it depression?

My life lingers on without your devotion

Children and parents

A bond never broken

Gravestones and Angels lie out in the open

Dreams and Wishes left unspoken…

Walking in the sunshine

words racing through my mind

A parents face keeps appearing all the time

A little boy lost in an adult vessel

A woman weeping at the graveside trestle

A Special Person knows no bounds

Whether love is lost or underground.

The Learned Kat

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